minhag - Naming Children After Living People

It is a widespread Ashkenazi minhog not to name a child after someone who is living. From where can this custom be sourced? Why is this so?

I would assume it is because it has some negative kabbalistic significance.

Answer

Various reasons why Ashkenazim do not name after a living person are given by Rabbi Simcha Cohen gives a set of answers. He points out that Nachor son of Terach was named after his (living) grandfather. He also points out at least one rav who was honored by having a baby named in his honor. One of the sources for this minhag can be seen in Sefer Chassidim 460; Shaarei Halachah Uminhag, vol. 3, p. 298.

Why cannot Ashkenazic Jews be named after a living person? Why are Sephardic Jews named after a living person? Is this law or just custom?

My mother-in-law shared a name with my father-in-law's mother. When it came time to name my eldest daughter, they were very careful to make sure that we did not use a middle name and that we used the Yiddish spelling and pronunciation rather than the Hebrew spelling and pronunciation. The superstition expressed was that if the two were given the same name, the Malach Hamaves would show up to take one of them within the year (probably the older one).

Click here for an Orthodox answer by Rabbi Simcha Cohen

The Bible and the Talmud do not contain any reference to this prohibition. Indeed, just the opposite, the Lubavitcher Rebbe notes that from verses in Genesis it is evident that Terach (father of Abraham) named his son Nachor during the lifetime of his father Nachor.(See Genesis 11:24-26; Sha'arai Halacha U’Minhag,Yoreh Deah, Volume III, p.298)

In addition, the Talmud records a case of a mother concerned about the circumcision of her third son whose two older son’s died as a result of circumcision. Rav Natan gave sage advice that was followed and the child lived and was named “Natan HaBavli”. (Shabbat 134a) The overt indication appears to be that the name given to the child after the Rav was an act of honor to the Rav and certainly not a sinful act.

However, he then explains that Ashkenazim began following this custom for various reasons.

In Ashkenazic Europe the custom developed to refrain from naming children with the names of living persons. The following rationales are presented.(Some with sources, some without.).

Common custom is to name children after parents or grandparents who are no longer alive. To name a child after a living person gives the impression that one wishes they were dead, Chas V’Shalom.- (B’rit Avot 8:20 cited in the name of Noheig Katzon Yosef) When a child, together with his/her father or grandfather have the same name, the Angel of Death may, by mistake, kill the youngest rather than the father or grandparent.

According to Jewish law it is not deemed proper respect to call one’s parent by his/her first name.(Yoreh Deah 240:2) Giving a child the name of the living parent or grandparent would generate confusion and a belittlement of respect.(Chelkat Yaakov, Yoreh Deah 136,Shmirat HaGuf V’haNefesh, Vol. II, 154:9) To forestall such errors, Ashkenazim simply did not name children after a living person.

Thus, concern for proper respect for parents, mysticism, coupled with fear of the “evil eye”, serve as the basis for the custom. There never was an official rabbinic law to outlaw naming a child after a living person. It is merely a custom that has prevailed comparable to a rabbinical ban. (It is merely an extension of the mystic position of Rabainu Chan’anel.)

Many years ago a family requested that I perform a wedding during the Nine Days commemorating the destruction of the holy Bet HaMikdash. I mentioned that according to jewish law one was not to be married during this period of time. To this they responded that they were not too religious and were not perturbed about violating the law. When I mentioned that it was deemed “Bad Luck” to get married at that time, they immediately changed the date for the wedding. In other words even Jews who are not observant on a regular basis will not be involved with any matter shadowed by the spectre of “Bad Luck”. So too with the Ashkenazic ban against naming a child after living persons. No one wishes to galvanize “Bad Luck” upon their children.(Kashe sakanta m’isurah)

The Sefardim simply never adopted any such customs. They follow the original tradition wherein it was totally permitted to name children after living persons. Indeed, they deem the act as a form of granting honor to parents or grandparents.