Following the current trend of pitting the particles に and で against each other, here is another question that does the same but from another type of usage and perspective.
When we want to say "do X before Y", we use "Y 前に X":
食べる前に「いただきます」と言う。
On the other hand, when we want to say "do X after Y", we use "Y 後で X":
食べた後で「ごちそうさまでした」と言う。
What is the simplest explanation to explain the differences between 前 and 後 that make 前 goes with に while 後 goes with で in the two situations above?
Answer
で derives from に＋て, and て roughly corresponds to the present/past participles (-ing, -en) in Western languages. Kuno (1973) notices that て implies temporal order. So when you have
走ってころんだ
'(By) running, I fell',
running has to precede falling; it cannot be the other way around. This much is the general consensus.
Notice that the usage of で in the question involves temporal notions rather than locations. Now, I found an interesting explanation here: Q14 that connects the facts mentioned above. According to this, when you have an expression
A [temporal noun] で B,
the て that is included in で obeys the temporal restriction mentioned above; that is, what is expressed by A [temporal noun] has to precede B. Going in the other temporal order is not allowed. Therefore, expressions like
食べた後で「いただきます」と言う。 [Temporal order: 食べた => 言う]
are grammatical but
× 食べる前で「いただきます」と言う。 [Temporal order: 食べる <= 言う]
× 食べるよりも先で「いただきます」と言う。 [Temporal order: 食べる <= 言う]
are not. に can be used by all the examples above:
食べた後に「いただきます」と言う。
食べる前に「いただきます」と言う。
食べるよりも先に「いただきます」と言う。
If there is preference of 食べた後で「いただきます」と言う over 食べた後に「いただきます」と言う, then some kind of slight difference in meaning like what phirru mentions in the comment may be playing a role here.
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