Wednesday 4 January 2017

shabbat - Is it appropriate to sing Aishet Chayel for a childless woman?


I have seen a tradition that has husbands using Proverbs 31 ("Aishet Chayel") to bless their wives, with children rising up and going to the mother and kissing her. This text even has reference to "her children" rising up to bless her.


If a woman has no children is it appropriate for her husband to use this traditional Aishet Chayel blessing on Shabbat?



Answer



Just a copy/paste from a nice article on the subject found HERE



Avigdor Shinan introduces “Eishet Chayil” in the Siddur that he edited and annotated, as follows: This biblical passage has been included in the Siddur since the 17th century (when Kabbalists established other portions of the Friday night liturgy, such as poem Lecha Dodi—jb). Its recitation on Friday evening is interpreted alternately as referring to Shabbat, the Tora, or the Divine Presence, and it describes the Sephira of Malchut according to the Kabbalists. Nevertheless, many today understand it as a song of praise and thanks that the members of the family sing in honor of the matriarch of the home for all that she does during the week in general, and what she has done getting ready for Shabbat in particular.



Assuming that singing Ashet Chayil does not trigger any unpleasant feelings for his wife, then there is no problem singing it as the passage is a allegory (indeed the source for Ashet Chayil is in the book of Mishlei) as mentioned above and verses like "her children rise up" can be interpreted on a deeper level.



I encourage you to read the whole article to get a deeper understanding of Ashet Chayil


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