Avot Derabbi Natan 9:2, commenting on Bamidbar 14:22, enumerates the 10 times that B'nai Israel tested G-d in the desert. The Mishnah states that G-d did not punish them until they spoke lashon hara about the land of Israel.
This implies that speaking lashon hara was even greater than the sin of the Golden Calf which was idol worship.
I mention that sin specifically because we see similar phrasing in Moses plea to G-d for forgiveness, such as mentioning that Egypt will think that G-d pre-planned to destroy his people in the desert. We also see a partial repetition of the 13 midot.
So G-d forgives the sin of the Golden Calf but not the sin of Lashon hara. Why was this sin unforgiveable?
Answer
This article offers an insight:
The reason why the punishment here is seemingly so harsh is because of the gravity of the sin of lashon hara that lashon hara drags back previous sins and makes one get punished more stringently for those too. Thus, via the lashon hara Bnei Yisrael did not just get punished for this sin, but in essence for parts of the previous sins too; HaShem says (14;22) ‘they tested Me ten times,’ (referring to the ten sins Bnei Yisrael did in the desert) since they now get punished for the complete unit of ten past sins due to this lashon hara. This might also be the explanation of a complicated Rashi (14;33) which says that when Bnei Yisrael sinned at the golden calf, HaShem decided the decree of wandering around for 40 years in the desert, but waited until the sin of the spies to utilise it. The point is, according to the above, that the lashon hara dragged back the deserved punishments for past sins.
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